I want to help you prioritize your sexual healing.

“Trauma or not, everyone can benefit from expanding their knowledge, experience, and vocabulary around pleasure. Kai provided a well thought out space with safe guidance to explore.” - Katie H.

I believe in healing your sexual being thru pleasure practices. I believe in creating a shame free space to explore with curiosity and playfulness. I believe is delving into the watery depths of your sexuality.

Living in a society that emboldens messages of sexual shame and violence — we all have healing work to do. My approach to this work is transcorporeal in that your sexual being is holistic — including your body, mind, and spirit. Everything is connected, so our work will include guidance beyond your sex life. We will work to redefine and reimagine your sexual life in a way that is gentle, slow, and intentional. You deserve to be the subject of your sex life.

What our sessions will contain:

  • emotional support in working thru deep rooted sexual trauma

  • intentional questions to guide you to further connect with your sexuality

  • creative assignments to awaken your sexual being

  • connecting with resources tailored to your needs

  • building an ecosystem of support for your sexual liberation journey

Areas of expertise:

  • healing from sexual trauma/violence

  • queer and trans issues/support

  • relationship by design — guiding you in building intentional romantic and sexual connections (both monogamous and non-monogamous)

  • BDSM and kink practices

  • working thru sexual dysfunction

We’ll work weekly thru 1 hour video calls. My rates are sliding scale, starting at $75 a session. I work with people of all genders and sexualities.

The first step in our work is to better understand and
embrace your sexual desires.

You are worthy of receiving healing energy. You are worthy of experiencing pleasure exactly how you crave it. Your body is a good place to be. You deserve to center yourself as you heal (yes, be selfish!).

So many of us go thru healing work isolated. I believe in creating an ecosystem of support and care so we can carry each other in this work. I will hold space for your sexual journey thru these one-on-one sessions.

Some goals we might work on together:

  • working on becoming the sexual subject of your sex life

  • being able to communicate your desires with partners

  • healing your relationship to your body

  • prioritizing pleasure

  • being intune with your sexual responsiveness

  • navigating nuanced consent within kink/BDSM relationships

  • building intimacy into all of your sexual relationships — with yourself, with casual and/or longterm partners

  • learning what enhances your pleasure experiences

  • resolving/healing from trauma and understanding its nonlinear impact on your sexuality

  • unlearning sex negative thoughts that have shifted how you relate to your body and sexuality

Photo by Yunique Saafir

Photo by Yunique Saafir

Why I do this work.

When I was 20 years old, I was sexually assaulted for the third time. It was around the same time I began to come out to myself as queer. As I was healing from the trauma inflicted on my body, I was searching for support that was specific to my needs as a queer person. I thought being sexually assaulted had possibly informed my queerness. I felt lost. I was disconnected from my body. I had no clue what sexual pleasure was. I felt so isolated and alone.

But I knew I was not the only queer survivor out there. So I decided to begin telling my story in an attempt to connect with a support system and community. I found the more I told my story, the more people opened up to me about their sexual trauma historicities. I knew this was my purpose. I found words for what had happened to me and all these other survivors I was connecting with. They came up to me after I did a speaking engagement saying “How did you get to this point? I’m still so stuck. I feel so broken. I don’t feel connected to my body.” The amount of survivors I’ve connected with — after community workshops, in the ER, at a bar while I’m out, during a friends birthday celebration, waiting in line for coffee, via Instagram DM — is in the hundreds.

But we don’t have to heal isolated and alone. I believe in creating an ecosystem of support for those I work with.

As a queer non-binary femme, I believe in prioritizing the ways in which queer folx need nurturing spaces that are specific to our experiences. As I began to integrate practices of nurturing masturbation and embracing sensuality in my daily life, I found a energetic weight lift in my life. There is no “healed” destination — but we can hold one another as we delve into the watery depths of this work. Now I am a certified sex educator and Reiki practitioner — integrating these two practices to hold a nurturing and intentional space for others who are seeking sexual liberation as well.